DEFINING SUCCESS

❝If you want to change how you see your problems, you have to change what you value and/or how you measure failure and success.❞ -Mark Manson

How many times have you seen an image similar to the one above? Many times, it's shown as an iceberg, with the "success" aspect being above the water and the "hard work" part being below the water.

Whether it's an iceberg or a triangle, it's a great visual because it reminds us that, while we can see other people's success, we don't see the hard work that went into it.

Yet, it's never that simple.

Before diving in, full disclosure - this post is heavily influenced by one of my favorite people to follow on Instagram, steinbergdrawscartoons, in his post called Hard Work, Success, and You. Please go check out the original post now.

SUCCESS AND HARD WORK

The first thing that makes this visual tricky is the fact that the visual is riddled with survivorship bias. Survivorship bias refers to the fact that we only tend to look at the people who succeeded.

In other words, we don't see all the people who worked hard but didn't succeed.

Another issue with the original visual is that it says nothing about the emotional benefits (if any) of achieving that success. There are a lot of people who "won the game" but don't feel fulfilled.

The Value Compass is designed to help you gain insight into your own values and how they guide your thoughts, feelings, and actions. It can be used to explore your personal goals and motivations, as well as to gain a better understanding of others' values and how they may differ from your own.

WHO DEFINES SUCCESS?

Another issue with the popular visual is - what does success mean? Who defines it? How will you know when you get it?

Humans are susceptible to hedonic adaptation, meaning we get used to what we have. Once we get something, we want something else. It's easy to forget that what we have is what we used to want. Thus, we end up moving the goalposts.

Let's not forget other people. Achieving success is one thing until we see other people have more. We try to keep up with those proverbial Joneses.

If we don't know what we want out of life, we might end up chasing someone else's definition of success. That, combined with hedonic adaptation and social comparison, leads us to continually strive for success, never really being satisfied.

Choosing your own vision of what you want out of life lets you define your own success.

Success is related to hard work, of course. But it's not as straightforward as you might think.

You get one life; live intentionally.

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REFERENCES AND INFLUENCES

Adams, Scott: How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big Burkeman, Oliver: Four Thousand Weeks Burkeman, Oliver: The Antidote Manson, Mark: The Subtle Art of Not Giving a Fuck

Robin, Vicki: Your Money or Your Life

Steinberg Draws Cartoons: Hard Work, Success, and You Ware, Bronnie: The Top Five Regrets of the Dying